Excerpt - Part I

12:33 PM Michael Etienne Edwards 0 Comments

I don't know, I don't know where
it came from, from winter or a river.
I don't know how or when,
no they were not voices, they were not
words, nor silence...

..there I was without a face
and it touched me.

I did not know what to say, my mouth
had no way
with names,
my eyes were blind,
and something started in my soul,
fever or forgotten wings,
and I made my own way,
deciphering
that fire,
and I wrote the first faint line,
faint, without substance, pure
nonsense,
pure wisdom
of someone who knows nothing,
and suddenly I saw
the heavens
unfastened
and open,
planets,
palpitating plantations,
shadow perforated,
riddled
with arrows, fire and flowers,
the winding night, the universe.

- Pablo Neruda

Re-blog

1:47 PM Michael Etienne Edwards 0 Comments

"Loving yourself simply means doing that. It does not mean becoming enamored with who you are. It does not mean worshiping or idolizing yourself to a masturbatory level of self-adulation.
Self-love is this: Patience. Kindness. Be gentle with yourself. Don’t hold yourself to ridiculous standards, and don’t reprimand yourself for not living or achieving how or what you think you “should” live or achieve. Loving yourself means taking your time, allowing your dreams to nurture themselves. It means planting a garden: starting with a few seeds tenderly nestled in the dirt and sprinkled with water, and being content to watch peacefully as the seeds grow, little by little, into your garden. Loving yourself means being brave. It means having the courage to live your truth, and bravery does not mean not being afraid. It’s okay to be afraid. Loving yourself means giving yourself permission to be afraid, and holding your own hand as you are, until you are comforted. Loving yourself means giving yourself time and space, to say “it’s okay I didn’t step forward today. I will take two steps forward tomorrow”. It means walking without a stick into the darkest forest, and letting that journey unfold as it will."

In this moment

9:11 AM Michael Etienne Edwards 0 Comments

Feel

Veronica

8:01 AM Michael Etienne Edwards 0 Comments



"You make all things new. "

Intent

11:38 AM Michael Etienne Edwards 0 Comments

Tricky

Listen to myself.

Backspace. Rewrite.

Mindgame. no..yes? Easy dress to slip into - laced in pride, adorned by ego.

My mind, my heart goes, 'What do they need from me', 'what would I want them to say to me in this situation' furnishing me with words.

Again.
My intention? Mask on, mask off.

The hanger softly screeches as I advance it back and leave it there. Further back but still there. Is this good? I don't think so.

Soft smile.

In the mood for another outfit.


Mostly

8:55 PM Michael Etienne Edwards 0 Comments



Most of the time I'm spending it wishing time would slow down.

I get home - fall onto the bed and glare down at the clock at the margin of the navigation bar. Then fingers/eyes proceed going through Ebay's deals of the day.

Glance again - 10:10 - dread creeps in - another evening at home, the evening I lusted over all day at work is disappearing again without any reason to remember it.

Longings whirlpool down the drain - grainy sediment settles around the tub edges - skin cells - dreaming/wishing they could go down too - avoiding work the next day